the tender cinnamon magic machine that produced hannah montana

Happy birthday dear David. David’s the best, and I think he’s super funny. Here is an example for the people at home. He was asked this probably-unintentionally-amusing question about this song: “Who do you think could learn the most from the song? or who do you think needs to hear its message? It'd be great if you could give me five-ish individuals, people groups, types of people, or whatever who you think could learn the most.”

And here is what he said, I thought it was funny.

If, during the holiday season, you have ever confessed to your significant other, “I am so in love with you my debit card is getting hot and tingly,” or “When I saw the deep discounts at Abercrombie, I wanted to lick the chai nog latte off of your hummingbird tattoo,” then this song is for you.

We think the message is one of seasonal Jesus-y hope, romantic joy, and soap dropped in Sam Walton’s shower.

With this song Tennis Pro extends our down-home brand of holiday wishes and/or stinging rebuke to:

1. Lovers in reindeer sweatshirts all around the world who show up at the mall with folding chairs and a cooler.
2. The tender cinnamon magic machine that produced Hannah Montana.
3. The fine makers of Skyy Vodka.
4. KING 5 news anchor Jean Enerson.
5. Anyone who has been in a Car Toys store, like, ever.
6. Moist 106.9 FM, “Where the Christmas Spirit is running down our leg.”

Julie just sent me these turkey pics she took at Thanksgiving, I hope my vegeterian and vegan friends will forgive me.