ryan quotes

Now for an installment of Ryan quotes pulled from his emails to me this week.

On these 'Christian alternatives' to MySpace and Facebook:

Wow! There's so many. I love "holypal" and "mypraize"! I'm sure you could infiltrate those sights and raize some holy(pal) hell!

On the show Cake Boss, which is the only show all of us in our family like equally:

I've never heard of Cake Boss. It sounds fun and amazing. I'll sent my fazers to stun and record it tonight. I'm frothing at the mouth with television scheduling anxiety.

On his beard:

In other news, I'm growing a beard. I feel like I've been inducted into some beard society at work. I liken it to the brotherhood bald men must engage in. I find that when I come into work, my bearded brethren want to check in with me and the progress of my growth. I must investigate further and see if I can't infiltrate the layers of this beard cult.

On...I don't know, duvets:

I know someone who looks like a cross between Seth Meyers (from SNL) and Andy Dick (from Andy Dick). He works for Pottery Barn Kids and I often use him to get me discounts on their merchandise. Really! I got a killer sailboat duvet that's on my bed right now.

On commuting:

I was on a super crowded train this morning and was looking at all the people smashed into me and thought to myself, "All these people resulted from a night of passion."