David just called Colin, who was sitting in the Starbucks by his house. David asked how he was doing and he said not good. David asked why and he said that three minutes before he called, a fat man had walked up to him and whispered hoarsely in his ear "You're fucking hot," and then went outside and rode off on a bicycle.
I told David that guy is probably going to put a missed connection on Craigslist for Colin. David said I should write one as the guy. Don't mind if I do! *cracks knuckles*